


An Apple A Day

by river_soul



Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-08
Updated: 2012-04-08
Packaged: 2017-11-03 06:15:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/378219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/river_soul/pseuds/river_soul
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>toddler!Jim, Bones, Uhura, Spock and a brief appearance by Scotty.</p>
<p>He hadn’t gone near Spock, and McCoy wasn’t entirely certain the Vulcan wouldn’t use his infamous grip on Kirk, toddler or not, so it was probably for the best.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Apple A Day

**Author's Note:**

> This is for jazmin22. She asked for Uhura taking care of temporarily de-aged toddler!Jim; ensemble, Uhura/Spock. This is pure crack.

Dr. Leonard McCoy was having, by all accounts, a fantastic day. The sick bay had been mostly deserted and thankfully quiet. There had been the occasional patient, whom he’d diligently screamed at and verbally abused until they were fit to return to duty. Then there was Nurse Chapel, who was currently stealing glances at him across the bay, a pretty blush spreading across her pale cheeks when he caught her.

All-in-all, McCoy was ready to chalk it up as a pleasant day before Spock walked in, a squalling toddler held an arms length away, doing its best to squirm out of the Vulcan’s grasp.

“Dr. McCoy,” Spock began, “I require you assistance.”

\---

It was, as Scotty was so adamantly swearing to both McCoy and Spock, not a possible side effect of the beaming technology. Still, that didn’t explain why a two year old James T. Kirk was currently in the process of tearing apart McCoy’s infirmary. He had responded, as one might expect of Kirk at any age, badly to direct authority. He’d kicked McCoy twice in the shins when he tried to get close enough to take some blood samples. He hadn’t gone near Spock, and McCoy wasn’t entirely certain the Vulcan wouldn’t use his infamous grip on Kirk, toddler or not, so it was probably for the best.

“Son of a bitch,” McCoy cursed as Kirk once again managed to wiggle out of his grasp and disappear under one of the beds. “When this all over, I’m going to kill you, Jim,” he swore, ambering back into a standing position only to come face-to-face with Uhura. Her smile was pleasant and neutral but McCoy could see the amusement in her dark eyes.

“So it’s true then,” she said, squatting down beside him to get a look at the toddler who had managed to press himself into the impossibly small space between the wall and the beginning of the bed. “Do you know what’s wrong with him? How it happened?” she asked.

“No,” McCoy replied, pinching the bridge of his nose to ward off the inevitable headache that was coming. “I can’t get close enough to get blood samples or check him out,” he confessed tiredly.

“I might be able to help with that,” Uhura admitted, craning her neck to look up at the good doctor before turning her attention to Jim. She wigged her fingers at him, grinning. “Is mean, old Dr. McCoy yelling at you?” she asked, a fake pout settling over lips.

McCoy rolled his eyes at the answering nod Jim was undoubtedly giving her.

“What say you and I go get one of those candies that nice Nurse Chapel has on her desk, hmm?” she asked Jim, the expression her face uncharacteristically soft and careful.

“It is highly doubtful that the Captain will respond to such a blatantly ploy, his age not withstanding,” Spock noted, from a few feet away.

Uhura ignored him.

From under the bed came a voice, high pitched in timber but unmistakably Kirk’s. McCoy wasn’t entire sure what the shrill gurgle of words he let out meant but Uhura was nodding enthusiastically before she turned around. “I believe he wants you to leave. Both of you,” she told McCoy and Spock.

“Oh for the love of Christ, I am not leaving my own goddamn infirmary,” McCoy told her in his best stern voice but she was having none of it, fixing him with an even glare. From behind them both, Nurse Chapel cleared her throat quietly.

\--

McCoy couldn’t believe it.

Inside the infirmary, Kirk was sitting calmly on Uhura’s lap, sucking away happily at a lollypop as he let Nurse Chapel take his blood. From this angle, on the other side of the glass, McCoy could clearly tell, without the aid of actually being able to hear it, that Chapel was making a cooing noise. Kirk smiled, his chubby little hands resting on Uhura’s arm and shoulder for balance. She bounced him in her lap, eliciting a sharp cry of delight before blowing a raspberry against his plump cheek.

“Lt. Uhura appears most proficient with small children,” Spock noted, an odd note in his voice as he watched the communications officer tickle the toddler again. “Although I find this entire situation very peculiar.”

“Fucking weird is more like it,” McCoy whispered under his breath as Nurse Chapel opened the doors to the infirmary.

“You may come in now,” she told them, unable to contain her smile. “I have the blood work ready at station 3 for you to look at, Doctor,” she told McCoy, who shot her a murderous glare before falling in line behind her.

When they entered Kirk immediately stopped his game with Uhura, staring at them warily. Uhura murmured something soothing to him but the pouty line of lips just increased. Spock for his part appeared unaffected, although McCoy was ready to strangle something. Preferably a fully grown version of the toddler who had reduced his head nurse and the ship’s communication officer into baby-talking, nonsense-spewing putty in his hands.

\--

It was, once McCoy was able to get his hands on Jim’s blood work, easily reversible. The small nanites that had somehow infiltrated his system from their last mission were disabled with minimal effort. There had only been one or two small temper tantrums during the treatment that had ceased once McCoy agreed to let Kirk continue sitting on Uhura’s lap for the duration until he was able to administer a sedative.

After that Jim had rapidly begun to age over the next few hours, much to McCoy’s relief. When it was all said and done, Kirk was standing, dressed once again in the gold of the Captain’s uniform, fully healthy. He appeared no worse for the wear, if not a bit weirded out by the whole experience.

“You should be back to normal in a few days, your body chemistry is still readjusting,” McCoy told him, his characteristic frown present as he regarded Jim over the data pad.

“Cool,” Jim said, eyeing Nurse Chapel at her station with a lazy, half smile that irritated McCoy immensely for reasons he couldn’t quite name. Although he didn’t remember the experience himself, Jim had managed to get most of what had happened out of Spock, much to Uhura and Nurse Chapel’s chagrin.

“So, tell me again, Bones,” Jim started, leaning forward into the doctor’s personal space, “did I really spend the entire day sitting on Uhura’s lap?”


End file.
